Friday, May 12, 2006

I made it

Im in France now, in a taxi on my way to the hotel. I
cant wait to take a shower and get something to drink.
Lots of thinking on the plane about my fertility and
miscarriages, probably because Ive got AF but its also
that time of year. I was also reminded of how badly I
wanted to come here after my first loss. Well here I am.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Have I been ignoring you?

No I haven't. I've just been busy with things and this luteal phase is thankfully so much better than they have been somewhat recently. Just a little breast tenderness, minor irritability, a few pimples that you might not even notice, and just a touch of bloating.

What has changed though to have caused this profound difference. By gosh I don't know, I just don't know. I have been using my hot water bottle on my woomba regularly in the evening, also drinking my herbs and going for weekly acu. I have been trying to take more exercise with the weather being nicer. But still, I wouldn't think it was enough to make a difference. And the stupid thing is that I could stop the herbs and acu and I bet I would hurt like hell again the next luteal phase. That's freaking sad and it irritates me too (I did mention I was a little irritable).

I don't know if I mentioned it but my acu appointments are covered but only while I'm not trying. I get 10 or 12 treatments included through my insurance from work. Pretty rad eh? They won't cover treatment for fertility though -- but the difference between not trying and trying is like nothing at all, especially since the qi problems are still the same. Strange, eh?

My latest is Yin deficiency, and I've been feeling tired and drained. Still got the Liver Qi Stag., Phlegm, Blood Deficiency and I'm sure Spleen Qi Def (related to the Phlegm and Blood Def.) Still I'm having less PMSy/breast pain issues this cycle -- but more slight constipation which is fun and supposedly Liver Qi stag. related.

I made chicken livers earlier this week, to help get more heme iron in my diet. Not my favorite thing but my body seems to appreciate it.

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I visited with my friend who has the stage 4 cancer yesterday. Oh my gosh what she has been through. And one of her cancer docs told her that she had less than a 5% chance of living to the end of the year. That made me so angry, they totally don't know that. The book Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster makes mention of a study that showed that when doctors told certain patients with "terminal" illnesses that they had x number of weeks or months to live that the patients would just die like on clockwork at that time. But treated elsewise, without having time marked for them and they would keep on going. So freaking pooh on that damn doc for telling her such a thing. She had a tumor blocking her colon and the surrounding tissue was so swollen and distended that the surgeon couldn't reconnect the colon where the malignancy was removed from so she has a temporary colostomy. The cancer has spread to her lymph system so they removed a ton of lymph nodes. Her liver showed a mass a few months ago but she just had tests a few days ago and there was nothing there. Not on the ultrasound, not on the MRI, not on the x-ray. She's been having acu and energetic treatments -- Seattle has a lot of alternative medical practitioners so if you are open to it it's available to you. One of her practitioners said that when she first started working with my friend she could feel the cancer, but there was one treatment where my friend felt an energy shift (she got hot or something like that) and ever since then the practitioner can't feel the cancer any longer. If she can make it through all this nasty chemo and gain some weight back I feel truly in my heart as though she might be this. Please send her your very best healing thoughts and prayers. Thanks.